What do you do when you reach your late forties or early fifties and you still haven’t found “the one.” I don’t have an answer for that, but I’m sure many look back on their life with a very different set of eyes. Perhaps they were too stringent in their type selection? Perhaps they spent too much time entertaining dreams instead of dealing with reality? Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps…and the answer may still elude them.
So how can all this be avoided? I really don’t know, life isn’t scripted and is different for everyone. I’m of the mindset that soul mates don’t just manifest, but are created. I think we create the bond with someone that connects our soul. It’s not some magical happenstance, but the result of years and years of painstaking work. The idea that you will one day meet that person meant for you and afterward live a life full of bliss and problem-free is just a heinous lie. Falling in love is much easier than staying in love, and staying together is much harder than splitting apart.
Does this mean that everyone that has gone through a rocky relationship just didn’t put any effort into making it work? Certainly not. Sometimes all the effort in the world can’t make a square peg fit into a round hole. I’m saying that when the road of being a couple gets rough, that’s not an automatic soulmate killer and when a relationship ends, that not an automatic soulmate search killer.
Not finding that special someone could be as much, or more, your fault than that of the universe. I’m reminded of a funny picture of a woman asking God why he didn’t send her a man like she asked…and God replying that he did, but she said he was just a friend. This is just an example of that person you could end up spending your life with being a great conversationalist (something very important in the golden years) instead of a shallow clone of your favorite music or movie star.
Happily ever after is something that happens in fairy tales. Lifelong companionship is something that happens in real life…after a lifetime of hard work. Talk to any couple that has been together for thirty or more years and you will find that there is very little they haven’t endured as a couple. The difference between them and other couples (and I’m being a bit simplistic here) is that they made a decision to share their soul with their mate, instead of waiting for their soulmate.