Sunday, November 17, 2013
The Ebb and Flow
There are many metaphors used to describe life, and all of them are accurate at some point in time. Find any one of them you like or think sums up the totality of life, and you can probably find some instance in your life experiences where it proved true…at least at the time. I find that instead of applying or trying to live by words of wisdom (although the application of such does have its moments), reflective analysis does wonders to put things in perspective and paint the bigger picture.
People live by different beliefs and philosophies and what works or doesn’t work depends entirely on what is working, and what has not. Simply put, if its working for you, then it works. Now the question of it working for the next person can only be answered by the bravery of the next person to try it. That all said, everyone has a plan…even if that plan is no plan at all. This is important to establish early on in this post because the revelation that life doesn’t give a rat’s ass about your plan is crucial to making your plan work…for you.
We’ve all been there. Plodding along in life with our best laid plans guiding us to tangible goals and milestones by which we are measuring the progress of our lives. Life decides, for whatever reason, that your plan needs altering, and off the rails you go! Suddenly things are way tougher than you’ve ever expected them to be and although time is ever moving forward, you feel as though you are in a rut…stuck in time with nothing but headaches and pent up anger readily available for placing blame.
One day you’re on top of the world or at least riding high enough not to care to make the comparison and the next you are starting over…and because it’s hard, you view it with negativity. Now, consider that starting over is sometimes the best way to get ahead. Think about it. If the path you were taking was headed to where you wanted to be, then you probably wouldn’t be derailed. Instead you’d be still steadily headed forward. The fact that it ended is proof enough that an alternative is required. I say that with such surety, but that’s because I’m of the belief (again, it works for me) that there are no coincidences in life, just plans…most of which aren’t controlled by you.
Let’s continue with an example to highlight the idea that going back is also going forward. A man and woman meet and merge to journey life together. For whatever reason (because it really isn’t important in the big picture, just the smaller details), they separate and go back to journeying alone (or even perhaps with someone else). Now this can be viewed as a step back, but as the motto of this blog (Every angle cannot be seen until there is commitment to turning the shape) applies here…especially here.
Seeing a chance at a “do over”, getting an opportunity to get it right, is only viewed negatively when one is not turning the shape of their life around, and seeing the unseen angle of a second chance for what it really is. It’s an opportunity to apply what you have learned from the derailment of your first plan, in order to come up with a better second plan. Now let me be clear, the use of the terms “first” and “second” are used only for example purposes…and it may take several more plans before the right one is formulated that works (for you).
I tend to think of it as the ebb and flow of life. Like the ocean (ah, you didn’t think you’d escape this post without a metaphor did you?) , it flows and floods the shore, but then ebbs a bit before rushing forward again, deeper inland than the first push. Understand, going back a bit isn’t the bad part, it’s staying back and not pushing forward again that seals the deal unfavorably.
Taking the previous example, suppose that after the split, he or she meets a much better companion, form a more effective plan, and make strides and gains previously not seen in all the struggles of the former arraignment. Would starting over be such a bad thing after all? I’ll even go further and say that the best case scenario I just described doesn’t come to pass. Would starting over still be such a bad thing over prolonging an arraignment that no longer benefits or supports the established goals? What good are goals that you aren’t trying to reach? They might as well not even exist…and then you really have entered into the “rut” stage of life.
Everyone has plans that come apart at the seams and understanding that life does this often and without mercy (The Universal Plan) is key to understanding that such occurrences are also part of the plan…it just wasn’t your plan. Accept the ebb, embrace the new plan, and flow forward once again.